Have you ever had the feeling like you’re itchy but you can’t figure out where? Aah! I seriously just scatched my entire body furiously but can’t find out where I’m itching. I must have looked like a fool.

I had the strangest dream the other night. I was with among other people, Pastor Ben Shin. I have never ever talked to him in real life. Anyway, I was with him, and I think Jieun also, and we were around Stanford, and somehow we run into this group that’s there, and somehow I find out that they’re from this Korean church in Santa Clara, and that the guy is actually a pastor. And I say, hey that’s great! Pastor Ben should meet you! And I kind of hang out with them for a bit at their Santa Clara church. I actually go to some kind of Bible study. And there’s a lot happening at the church, and it makes me happy to see such an active church. I even think maybe I should go there. One scene I remember seeing is one room where the kids’ service is going on. But while they’re having service, a TV is also on, showing like a tennis game. Kind of staticky. And I was thinking how terrible to be showing TV during a children’s service, just to keep them occupied.

And my dad shows up there, and he’s in like a bathrobe and slippers, and he’s upset at me because I brought the newspaper there with me instead of leaving it at home.

Anyway, we decide to leave, and suddenly the group is me, Jieun, Henry and Lorraine. And we’re leaving from my old house in San Jose, just off of Monterey Highway near Branham Lane. We’re heading south on Monterey Rd. when we see like this massive, massive gauntlet that the police have set up. This is right on the ramp that leads to Cottle Rd, near the IBM. Anyway, they’re like making people take out everything from their cars; it’s a bit mess. And I’m thinking what’s going on. It really is like the biggest police thing I’ve ever seen. And I’m wondering if we’ll get stopped but the officers just let us go through because we’re on bikes. That’s when I realize, yeah, we’re all on bikes, me and Jieun on one bike and Henry and Lorraine on another. So we ride past and we realize that they have roadblocks set up all around, so pretty much no one can get through the area without going through the police. And I’m wondering, as I pedal, what the heck is going on.

That’s all I remember now. A lot more happened but I can’t remember it.

Anyway, the weird thing about this dream is how it incorporated all these things that have been on my mind recently. For example, I talked with Jieun last week and she was mentioning how she had been hanging out with Pastor Ben Shin. Thus, he was in my dream, although I personally have never talked to him. I can’t figure out the Santa Clara thing. Pretty weird. But the kids, you know, I’ve been helping with children’s ministry lately.

I also talked to Jieun briefly about my dad a couple nights ago so that’s there also. The last time I was in Fullerton, we went through this police blockade where everyone had to show IDs. So I’m assuming that’s where that came from. Anyway, it’s one of the few dreams where I could kind of figure out where the elements came from. Interesting.

I’m listening right now to this CD by this all girl Christian rock band, Rachel Rachel, who only produced 2 albums in the early 90s. The CD is called You Oughta Know By Now. I highly recommend it. I would even say that it’s one of my all time favorite albums, and no one’s ever heard of it. Anyway, it’s just good rock and roll, and it’s all girls! It really is a good, straightforward rock album. I highly enjoy it.

Anyway, it’s amazing how much music affects me. I almost never listen to music when I study because I end up getting so into the music that I can’t concentrate. So I need total silence to get anything done.

Anyway, one of my favorite songs in the world is off of this album. It just really moves me, in a way I can’t totally explain. But it’s called You’ll Never Know. A great great song. It’s just well well crafted. When I listen to certain songs, I get this really weird feeling. It’s like a mix of nostalgia, longing, content, sadness, joy, and all this stuff all rolled up into one. I guess if you’ve never felt this way about music I can’t even explain it, but it’s like there’s this ache in my heart, and it mixes up every strong emotion I can feel. I know, it sounds very artsy, like I’m some kind of bleeding heart weirdo, but that’s how it is.

So music really affects me, and it can cause strange things to happen. Moods, I mean. If you read mymind about my drive from Houston, I was seriously going through some weird mood swings. Anyway, today is the last day for a couple of the interns (from CMU) and that in combination with this blasted song made me really sad. I just get sad when time passes. I can’t believe how fast this summer is passing me by. The missions people are almost all back! It’s crazy stuff. Next thing I know I’ll be 30. Anyway, yeah, I was getting seriously depressed listening to the song. But it’s a good song. It’s like Marijuana – it just heightens the emotions you’re already feeling, good or bad. I read that in Go Ask Alice. I think.

Anyway, I just spent 3 hours listening to this song on repeat. It’s that good. What a great song.

On Saturday, a few of us from KCPC YAG went sailing at the Berkeley Marina. It was a lot of fun! Something about being out on the water. It was a fabulous day, and our host was a cool guy, pleasant conversation, and we really got to go out pretty far, so all in all it was quite cool. I think I’ll go again sometime.

I realized that I have pretty strange taste in music and movies. Strange actually isn’t the right word. It’s just very individual. Anyway, I can’t understand why people like the movies they do and why they don’t like what I like. It just boggles my mind. Like I pretty much hated Blair Witch. It was just boring, to be honest. I kept waiting to be scared, up until the credits. It just wasn’t that eventful. But from what I hear, I’m not alone in that. And ordinarily, I would just assume that the movie sucks. But I saw it with Henry and George, and both were genuinely scared. I could not understand that.

I also couldn’t understand why people didn’t like Pleasantville. The worst response you can give to this movie is that it was pleasant. And so many people said that – argh. The movie’s intent was for way more than being a pleasant movie, so you can either accept or reject it on those terms, but you cannot say it was pleasant. Anger.

A while ago I saw Snake Eyes with Nicholas Cage, and I liked it. I can’t explain it, but I just liked the movie. Anyway, everyone I was with pretty much didn’t. When I said I liked it, one guy said that I was easily satisfied. So I wondered, is that it? It’s just easier to please me, and that’s how my taste differs?

But that’s not it because there are a bunch of movies I just didn’t really like that apparently other people did. Like I didn’t really like the Wedding Singer. It was just OK. Already mentioned Blair Witch. Last night I saw the Thomas Crowne Affair, and I thought it was only OK. Pretty slow, though, and the music got on my nerves. But the other people I watched it with enjoyed it, so they said. Weird.

Anyway, one interesting thing is that I’ve found a movie critic (have I mentioned this before?) whose opinions consistently run exactly opposite of mine. Every movie he hates I love, every movie he loves I hate. He’s essentially the biggest fool in the universe. I’m not kidding. It’s amazing how opposite our tastes are, mine perfect and his, trash. Anyway, his name is Paul Tatara, and he reviews movies for CNN.

I don’t know how this happened but I’ve come to appreciate the art of filmmaking a lot more in the past year. I think it’s been from reading Roger Ebert’s movie reviews, which at times discusses some technical things, reading the shooting script of the Shawshank Redemption, which gave a considerable amount of insight to the filmmaking process, and listening to the commentary tracks on DVDs. But I just see a lot of cool things I didn’t see.

One thing I’m into is long steadicam shots. You know, long uninterrupted shots where the camera is moving with the action. It’s a very cool thing. The first part of Snake Eyes had that. I just appreciate it because movies nowadays use all these quick cuts. Especially like Armageddon. Crazy. So when you see these long cuts, it’s just cool because it requires so much – good actors, good sets, and good choreography of all the on screen movement. So I really liked the intro in Snake Eyes. Boogie Nights (which, warning, is pretty explicit in parts) also has these long shots, which is cool. The coolest thing on the Boogie Nights DVD is that they made a music video for Michael Penn while making the movie, and they filmed it in the longest hallway in North America. The entire video is one shot, and throughout the entire thing, Michael Penn is walking down the hallway. The amount of preparation and coordination for this just totally astounds me. And right at the very end, they reach the end of the hallway. It’s all one shot! That’s amazing!

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