I have a lot to learn about encouraging women. I read this article eons ago about a women’s basketball coach, he was saying how the best way to motivate women is different from the best way to motivate men. He was saying for basketball the best thing to do with men at times is just yell at them. Whereas for women, yelling won’t work as well, you have to do different things.
I think there’s some truth in that. I think for guys, sometimes the best thing is just to yell at them. Like when we’re lifting, to motivate someone you just basically yell at them to push them to go more than they want. That’s male motivation. Or like, Dave once sent me this e-mail once basically saying I was flat out wrong. Had to do with awkwardness on the phone and other social awkwardness, how when I talked about it I was resigning myself to it instead of working on it and how that was wrong. I dunno, that was just the right thing to say to me, just confront me, and it stuck with me. I still recognize certain limitations I have but I don’t resign myself to them. It’s a subtle thing I guess, but crucial.
But with girls, I don’t think that works, the confrontational / yelling style. I’m still learning what the best way is. But I sure as heck don’t have a grasp on it now.