Here’s a little secret, not really a secret, about me. I’m not very good at video games. I guess relatively, against people who never play, I’m OK, but against anyone who’s decent, I’m not very good.

In high school I used to play Dr. Mario with a friend all the time and he regularly kicked my butt. Frosh year, me and Eddie played tons of Texris. It’s this Tetris clone, but it allows you to set the dimensions of the board. Awesome. So we’d play these super tall, narrow boards, either 4 or 5 units wide. Absurd, but fun. I always play the extreme versions of things. That’s why I like fy_iceworld in Counterstrike.

But anyway, Eddie regularly beat me. It was maddening. Brian Ma kicked my butt in Puyo Puyo. Senior year, I got an N64 and Eddie would regularly beat me in Madden 64. That was frustrating – he’d do the exact same thing every single time. Play as the Broncos. Run the same sweep play with Terrell Davis. Unstoppable. If I defended against it, he’d call an audible and throw to Shannon Sharpe (is that right? The tight end that year). It was unstoppable. Argh.

So yeah, I dunno if I give off the impression that I’m a good gamer or whatever, but I’m really not. I dunno, not sure if people realize that.

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