I don’t understand why those are the only 2 possibilities, Dave. How about possibility 3: you learn to not be self-conscious with people in the “potential” camp? Yeah, maybe “impossible” but I don’t see how it’s more impossible than the other 2 options. And at least it’s something somewhat within your control. I dunno. With God all things are possible I guess.
I think I’ve said this before but I don’t like it when churches / modern evangelical Christianity over holify marriage. I fully realize I’m uncouth and unholy, but in this case I think I’m grounded in Scripture. Maybe I’m wrong. But yeah, listen to sermons on marriage and you’ll hear stuff about how it makes you better ministers, you represent Christ and the church, all these holy things. But what about physical attraction? Desire? Where is that?
I dunno, all I’m saying is that when you read Scripture on marriage, desire is there. Paul treats marriage almost like a concession. Definitely not a command. And it’s for those who can’t handle their passion. The book of the Bible that’s all (textually) about marriage and love is chock full of eroticism and desire.
All these other things, being coworkers, coministers, mutually encouraging, whatever, those are all good things and stuff that should happen if people do get married. I’m just saying, as to why people get married, Scripturally speaking, raw desire and attraction are a fundamental part of it. Only a part. But a fundamental one. So why whitewash it?
I dunno, maybe I’m placing too much emphasis on desire and passion and whatnot. It’s just, that’s what Scripture seems to say. And I don’t understand how substituting what Scripture says about something for your own ideas makes you more holy.