I think I’m growing, a little bit.
Like I keep saying, the theme of my life is take the easy road. So like, everything I get involved with, it’s easy for me. Programming, it’s easy. Doing music stuff at church, easy. Nothing I’ve been involved with has really been hard, or at least, nothing I’ve stuck through with.
Anyway, I’m currently involved with something that’s been really hard, just a struggle every single week. Basically, my natural ability isn’t enough. Predictably, I wanted to give up. But with Jieun and others’ help, I was encouraged to stick through with it. I dunno, find a small measure of hope in that. It feels like progress.
This and basketball and maybe some social interaction things are possibly the only things in my life that I do that don’t come easy. And this particular is significant because it has spiritual ramifications. It’s just one of the first times in a long while when I’ve really had to depend on God for things to go well, not being able to depend on my own ability at all. And that’s kind of exciting.
Really hard though. I’m afraid I’m gonna burn out.