Today in swimming we started the butterfly. I totally suck. I was without question the worst one there. I’m just not naturally coordinated; I have to totally think it out and will my body into doing what I want. Anyway, at first, I was moving my body in such a way that I wasn’t getting my head out of the water enough to get enough air. So I was literally dying – running out of oxygen. I had to stop halfway through the pool. It was so bad I wanted to just leave, and never come back. I’m not joking about how bad it was. The instructor made us go the other way on our backs. I’m pretty sure he thought that if we did the same thing again, I would drown.

By the end of the day, though, I was getting better at it. I was still terrible, slow, and with hideous form, but I was breathing at least, and had a semblance of rhythm to my stroke.

So I felt pretty good. I mean, I was still among the worst ones there, but I was proud of myself that I stuck it out, even though I thought I was going to die. I made progress today, and that was a good feeling.

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