I have no idea why I’m writing, but whatever. LotG.
I was sitting around church on Sunday and I heard these kids talking about reading each others’ xangas. That’s just odd to me. These people were born in the 90s. What on earth do they have to say to each other? Are they even capable of introspective thought yet? I guess most people don’t care about introspection. Which is why my page is so boring. But whatever, it’s my page.
It’s really weird seeing older people after not having seen them for a really long time. They seem so… short. Both physically and in other ways. Just, before, they were like authority, bigger and older. Now it’s like being peers, and that’s kind of unsettling to me. I don’t like it when things bigger than me are brought down to my level. Makes me lose my sense of wonder. That makes no sense to no one but me.
Maybe it’s because I’m Christian? That I believe in a power higher than myself? I think some people like taking things higher than them and bringing them down, makes them feel stronger. Me, when things above me are brought down, I feel vulnerable. Maybe what it is is I have no confidence in my own power. So when things above me are brought down, makes me think I’m next? I dunno.
What does this have to do with people in authority becoming peers? Nothing really. They’re not being brought down, it’s kind of illogical. But I dunno, it’s just a gut reaction. So yeah, when people who were above me (and as a kid, that’s everyone older than me) become peers, in a tiny, strange way, it makes me a little bit sad. Not a huge deal, just something I noticed.